This week's pace was admittedly slower than last week's, which was a good thing for our family. As many of you know, moving is hard on everyone and leaves you tired and drained. We were grateful for the rest, and I'm happy to say that we have almost unpacked all of our boxes! We only had a couple of minor things break in their cross-country trek, which is a real testament to Amanda and those who helped her get our house packed up.
Genesis 9:13-16
I have placed my rainbow in the clouds. It is the sign of my covenant with you and with all the earth. When I send clouds over the earth, the rainbow will appear in the clouds, and I will remember my covenant with you and with all living creatures. Never again will the floodwaters destroy all life. When I see the rainbow in the clouds, I will remember the eternal covenant between God and every living creature on earth.”
Our neighborhood has turned out to be a great one for kids. Everytime the boys go outside, other kids just seem to show up out of nowhere. If you've ever watched birds on a telephone pole you have an adequate vision of what happens. One lands on the wire first, then within minutes you see one more appear, then three more, then four more on top of that. Their time with new friends has also provided a bit of respite for me and Amanda.
We decided to go ahead and move the kids to the elementary school that is 4 blocks away as opposed to keeping them in the same place through the end of the semester. At first we wanted to keep them from having to experience more change, but finally we came to the realization that it was too hard on Amanda to deliver them 2 and from school each day with a trip length of 30 minutes each way. Plus, the kids now will have an opportunity to make friends in the neighborhood prior to summer.
God's Work on Us
God continues to move in our lives in ways that are surprising, relentless, and sometimes painful. I quickly forget that I am a rock in a river, constantly being weathered away by the relentless surge of living water. He has an end in mind with me that I probably have no conception of, but I don't need to have a conception of the end. Only the Maker does. I am often reminded of what Mike said to me weeks ago regarding our relocation to Everett. "Paul, God bringing you here had nothing to do with what you were going to do here. It is about you and Him."
Isaiah 64:8
And yet, O Lord, you are our Father.
We are the clay, and you are the potter.
We all are formed by your hand.
As I pulled my last boxes out of storage this week and closed down our last U-Haul account, I began opening the last of my own possessions. I opened a couple of boxes of decorations from my former office at Summer Creek, including letters written by some faculty members prior to my departure that were a major encouragement to me. In opening the boxes, though, I had an array of mixed emotions. Many of the things made me smile and remember times on campus, particularly with individuals that I spent a lot of time with. But then the coin seemed to flip to the other side, exposing sadness at leaving that place and our former life. As I always do, I began to compare life now to life then, glossing over many things from the past and making them seem better than they were. Those moments are very personal and often very painful to me.
The Lord has taught me in these moments to go to Him in prayer and pour my heart out, and that I did. I don't do it in anger and shake my fist at Him. It usually involves me just telling Him how much it hurts and how distraught I am. And He listens.
One of my favorite book series of all time is The Chronicles of Narnia, an account of a magical land created by a lion. This land is complete with talking animals and a few humans. In the first book the land has been overcome by an evil witch who has declared herself Queen of the World. One quickly learns that she isn't queen and has only declared herself as leader of the land. The lion is the real ruler and creator of the world, and for a while he left this place, but eventually he returns to save his people and defeat evil forever. Does the story sound at all familiar?
In moments of prayer like these, I sometimes imagine the Lion of Judah sitting and listening to me pour my heart out. He says nothing during those times, but His gaze is on me and I feel His love and compassion for me. He doesn't growl like an angry lion, and He doesn't reach out with his sharp claws and rip me to shreds. But as the book says, "he isn't exactly a tame lion." The place He has me in right now isn't the final destination. It is a spot on the map leading to the eventual destination.
I believe what God is doing in me right now is a significant work of humbling me. I had no idea of how prideful I had become until He revealed it to me through the pain of leaving everything and everyone I knew. My world and work consisted of building my own kingdom, expanding it, and planning for the future...of me. It isn't that I lacked belief in God back then or that I wasn't following His leadership the way I should. I was just blind to a significant aspect of myself that had begun to separate me from the Lord like an idol or beloved posession that fills up all of your field of vision because you hold to it so closely.
In previous posts I have spoken some on God's economy but feel that I need to expand on that idea some more since this is what He is teaching me now. Here are notable contrasts between the way of the world and the way of God:
- In the world, the only way you get ahead is by asserting yourself. In the Kingdom, you let go of yourself completely. (Mark 9:33-35)
- In the world, achievement, status, college degrees, and size of bank account matter. In God's kingdom, they are trash. (John 12:24-25)
- In the world, the leaders are the ones who work hard, achieve, and push themselves into positions ahead of others. In God's kingdom, the leaders are the ones at the back of the line. (Matthew 20:25-28)
-In the world, people strive to publically do good things so that they receive praise for them. Lesser tasks are ignored or passed to someone else. In God's kingdom, good works done publically often receive no recognition at all from Him until you meet him in His kingdom. They certainly receive no recognition in this world. (Matthew 6:1-4)
-In the world, people strive to work in areas of strength. In God's kingdom, areas of weakness often are the things utilized to expand the kingdom. (2 Corinthians 12:7-10)
-In the world, our lives are ours to spend as we wish. In God's kingdom, our lives are his. (John 12:24-25)
- In the world, everything is about self, accumulating more, comfort, pleasure, and rising above insulting words. In God's kingdom, self and selfishness are excluded. (Mark 11:25)
An entire book could be written on the ideas listed above, but I want you to notice a theme by answering a question. Which of those things relating to God's kingdom do not involve death to self, humility, and surrender?
That in a nutshell is my struggle from this week. Pride has no place in God's kingdom. The most useful to him are those who can offer nothing but a heart for Him and complete surrender. That is the place that He is taking me to, and it is a painful road for those with the disease of Self.
1 Peter 5:5b- “God opposes the proud but favors the humble.”
I'll complete the thought with this. When you examine that list again and look at the things that are of this world, consider the following: on your last day here on Earth prior to your death, which of those things will matter? May we all view these things as God does, and may He give us eyes to see things as they really are in our lives.
Now for some surprising work of the Holy Spirit. I have a friend in Houston who was going through a major family emergency this week. The details of that emergency are not important for this blog, but in hearing about them I was moved suddenly to pray for him and send him a text about it. His response came much later but he commented that my "timing was absolutely perfect" due to what they were dealing with right at that moment the text came through.
Then there's me. In the throes of my depression last week I received an email and a text within minutes of each other, both of which indicated that I was being prayed for.
How incredible is that? Is my timing and sensitivity that good? No!!! For whatever reason, the Holy Spirit used me to encourage another brother in Christ. And others for whatever reason were moved to pray for me right in the moment I needed it. It still amazes me that this God is both present and engaged in places separated by many thousands of miles. What an amazing God! These things continue to happen regularly to us, and I am always appreciative and my heart is warmed knowing that this God actually cares about me. Sometimes I don't know why he bothers with me. Maybe you can relate.
Church Planter Dinner
We were priviledged to attend a dinner for church planters in Seattle put on by the North American Mission Board and Seattle Church Planting. This was an opportunity for Amanda and I to rest and fellowship with others without the kids (a vacation). We got reconnected with Bobby and Kelly Higginbotham from Tacoma, the missionaries we worked with when we visited Tacoma last July. We also spent some time with Jared and Corrie Burwell who live in Skyway. They have continued to be a real and tangible encouragement to us, and they represent yet another connection that the Lord orchestrated for us.
The dinner was a good time to talk about what is going on in ministry and to realize that what you experience isn't crazy or abnormal. I can only describe us all as ships out on a vast ocean sailing at night. Sometimes we pass each other, sometimes we simply see flashing lights on the horizon from another ship in the same Navy. We know other ships are out there, but many church planters will tell you that it can sometimes be a lonely life. It is always good for us to get together like this!
It also is a reminder as to the amount of help that is needed in the Pacific Northwest. I have come to realize that we don't need 1,000 pastors to show up here and build new churches, although that wouldn't hurt. We need families that are committed to Jesus and love Him, who are willing to uproot their families and get a job here, working a normal job and living a "regular" life while discipling others on the side in their communities. We need Christians living in their communities who are committed to being Jesus to their neighbors. These seemingly "lesser" actions (compared to preaching and leading a church) will lead to great changes in this area long-term. Preaching and church leadership are important, but they are only the beginning and scratch the surface. As I have said before, if we rely on people to show up to church buildings, we will accomplish very little here.
Upcoming Mission Trip
I was overjoyed a week ago to talk to one of the pastors back at Humble Area's First Baptist Church and hear that they are organizing a mission trip to Everett to work with us in July! What a tremendous honor and blessing. Here, as the Word says, the harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Mike and I have been planning since that conversation and brainstorming on things that can and should be done while the group is here. We know the Spirit will lead us on this. Our main goal, in alignment with HAFBC's, is to do something that will impact the community long-term and will draw more people to Christ. One-time events may make everyone feel good, but what I am finding is that the only thing that matters here is long-term relationship and discipleship of people. Please join us in prayer regarding the specific actions we will take with this mission team. Then let us all wait and see what the Lord does!
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